A note to those in the grocery store

First of all, I apologize for my child's recent grocery store meltdowns. She's 4 and trying to learn to navigate the world & sometimes doesn't do it as well as other times. She's an absolutely wonderful child, I promise. And a little thank you to those that have given me the sympathetic looks that say "I've been there, it's OK."

Now, second of all, for those that are a little less attuned to the intricacies of body language, please understand that when a 4 year old is starting to melt down & her mother is physically down on her level in order to try to thwart said meltdown, that is NOT THE TIME to stop and ask her a bunch of questions about the baby in the sling. Yes, she is adorable, and under normal circumstances I enjoy being told so. But when a small child is starting to lose it, it's fairly obvious- especially when you've been gawking at us for the last several minutes, as I've seen the 2 people doing that have done this to me. Perhaps your parenting is very different than mine and you would handle the situation differently, but right then is not the time to try to sway me to your way of thinking. So, please don't be offended when I tell you as politely as I can muster at that point that I really need to give my attention to my child. I don't multitask very well and being as I signed on to the responsibilty to raise her to be a good citizen of the world, she's my priority.

Thank you for your understanding.

Love is...

a stack of library books.

I vividly remember visiting the public library when I was a kid. I loved the quiet, the reverence for the books, the places the books took me. I remember loving to visit the library in school. Then college, though somehow all the required reading stole some of the joy of books. I think it was a solid year before I read anything other than magazines and those dreadful hospital policy & procedure manuals for my first nursing job.

But slowly, the love of books re-emerged. I started visiting the public library again, just wandering the aisles at first, then finally settling on a book. I sometimes had to limit myself- I read obsessively and will neglect other things in my life for the sake of finishing a well-written book. They have entertained me, moved me to tears, challenged my thinking and shaped who I am.

Then I had a child. And we read books. And she grew old enough to have opinions about books, so we started visiting our local library. Sometimes we go in with a topic for our book search, sometimes we go and simply pull interesting ones off the shelves. We've developed a relationship with the librarians who will sometimes suggest books because they think we'll enjoy them. They're usually correct. When Dillon commented once that girls couldn't be knights ( after seeing a picture of a girl in armour), the children's librarians had a list of "girl power" books to counter that assertation.

One of the first ways we dealt with getting Dillon ready for Corryn's surgery was to visit the library and ask for books about kids- specifically siblings- having to be in the hospital. It's the same way we helped prepare her for having a sibling. It works beautifully.

Thomas Jefferson was once quoted as saying, "I cannot live without books."

I understand that sentiment completely.

Happy Love Thursday- the last official one as it turns out.

Happy Birthday Dave!

41 years today! He requested a yellow cake with chocolate icing, which Dillon & I will be making for him in a few minutes. We even picked out star candles to put on top, though not 41 of them :)

On being 4 months old

Dillon asked the other night, "How come her cheeks just keep getting squishier and squishier?" Good ol' momma milk, honey :)

She turned 4 months old on Sunday. I have to admit that I like the 3 month plus stages better than the newborn. Not that I don't like the newborn part, but they are just sturdier and more interactive once they hit 3 months. She's starting to figure out rolling, which she kept doing as I was trying to get this picture yesterday. She's making all these great baby sounds. She's a pretty serious baby & will only give reserved smiles to strangers, though there are huge smiles and occasional laughter for Dave, Dillon and me. She loves watching Dillon. She's finally getting better with getting things to her mouth & doesn't hit herself in the face quite so much.

I think we finally figured out the food issues- cow milk, eggs and tree nuts. Between that and the wheat(actually probably gluten) intolerance I developed while pregnant, I have to be pretty creative about what I eat. But I know that in all likelihood her sensitivties are temporary & eating creatively isn't a bad thing. I've become a pretty good cook by having to work around these sensitivites (as well as the ones Dillon had at this same point). But that's a post for another day.

Happy 4 month birthday my little one!

Love is...

a little late this week! I just didn't have time yesterday to post.

Anyway- love is holding your sister's hand-

One of my favorite moments as of late was one day Corryn was on the floor and Dillon was sitting on her knees beside her, listening intently to a story being read. Corryn reached up in that erratic way she still does at 3 months old to grab Dillon's finger, but couldn't quite reach. Without ever looking down at her, Dillon put her hand down and a little closer to Corryn so she could grab hold. They stayed thay way through the end of the story.

We got lots of smiles in the grocery store yesterday as we did our shopping with Corryn in the sling and Dillon holding her hand. Made shopping a bit slower, but it didn't matter. I love that, at least for now, they both enjoy holding each other's hands. I pray that they always remember the importance of doing so.

So, Happy Love Thursday on friday! :)

Happy Mother's Day!

I learned this morning that the origins of Mother's Day had more to do with mothers advocating for peace- not wanting to lose their sons to war- than it had to do with gifts for mothers. In honor of this original purpose- and continued war in our world, there was a group that gathered locally with a call to stand for peace. It wasn't a demonstration of any sorts- just a group of people that gathered in a public place for 5 minutes of silence. The intention of the silence was to reflect on ways that we, in our own lives, can both demonstrate and perpetuate peace. There was a excerpt from a book regarding peace that was printed on handouts that were given.

I was a little concerned about Dillon being quiet for the 5 minutes, because, well, silence is just not one of her strong points. I explained to her that everyone was going to be quiet for a few minutes and that she would need to be as well. She chose to skip and dance around the fountain that everyone was gathered around, occasionally stopping to look at something on the ground or dip her hands into the fountain. She remained quiet for the entire time.

One of the lines in the excerpt was "We are standing for...A world in which they don't live in fear of violence-in their home, in their neighborhood, in their school or in their world." After it was over, a couple of the women there commented to me how wonderful it was to have Dillon there demonstrating the very reason we were all there publicly trying to figure out ways to make the world more peaceful. How fortunate for us to be able to stand up in a public place to commit to peace while my child plays happily, oblivious to the realities of war. I am too, really, but I know it exists.

She asked me what the time at the park was all about this morning. I explained that some people think that fighting is a better way to solve problems than using words and that we were trying to find ways too change that. She was satisfied with this explanation. But it helped remind me that probably the best way to perpetuate peace is to raise my children peacefully- teaching them that words are powerful tools for solving problems, much more so than physical actions. Of course, that is difficult to remember in the midst of a conflict between us- especially when I'm bigger and can physically move them somewhere, but today served as a reminder to me of how very important that is to commit to raising them peacefully.

A special treat for me

D: "Momma, as a special treat for you on Saturday, you can cook dinner! And you can do it as soon as I get up!"

Nevermind that I cook dinner most nights. I guess somehow it will be an honor to do so tomorrow.

Guess what!

Dillon went with Dave to run some errands. Corryn is asleep in the sling. I get to take a nap!!!

While she sleeps on my shoulder

I'll post a recent picture. Excuse the spit-up- she's a little like a faucet in need of a washer change- there's a continuous drip there!

And- her surgery is scheduled for June 13th. I'm coping a little better now. While I'm still having a hard time with the whole thing, I've reached a point that I am thankful that this was discovered before any problems occurred. Sigh. I'll still be glad when it's behind us.

Quote of the day

"Daddy, when I grow up I want to be a farmer. And I want to grow vegetables. And I want to have dogs and cats and horses and cows and sheep and lions and tigers and bears and giraffes all in a fence."

He didn't have the heart to tell her that some of her animals may not be as appreciative of her arrangement as others.

Love is...

a happy marriage.

Within a month of dating my husband, I knew I would marry him. Twelve years ago this coming Sunday, I did just that, on a very stormy day in a beautiful candlelit ceremony. Our vows were very traditional- for better for worse, in sickness and in health, 'till death do us part.

Shortly after our first anniversary, he went back to school in pursuit of admission to medical school & all that that entails. We committed to it together. At varying times it's been good, it's been interesting, and it's been dowright awful- but never has it been boring. During his internship year, there were times we were held together by a thread, but there was never a doubt it was there. As we look to a future in which the fruits of our many years of labor at this process are soon to pay off, we go together.

On our honeymoon, a waiter guessed we were newly married by our telltale shiny rings. It's so interesting looking at our rings now. Cleaned up, they're still shiny, but show the wear and tear of life- life shared with one you love.

Happy Love Thursday!

That blessed silence

There are certain red flags Dillon gives when she's in need of a nap. They were all there today, so I decided to take a little drive this afternoon. I got Corryn asleep and even transferred her to the car seat without waking her. I told Dillon we were going to have a quiet drive and listen to some music.

D: Mom, as soon as you tell me it's time to be quiet, I will.
W: It's time to be quiet
D: Already it's time to be quiet?
W: Yes, already
D: OK, I'll be really quiet
W: silence
D: Mom? Why do those clouds up there look like steam?
W: Remember quiet time?
D: Oh yeah, I'm going to be quiet
W: OK good
D: Why'd you say "OK good"?
W: Quiet time Dillon
D: I don't think I can be quiet for very long
W: (thinking REALLY???!!!) Well, let's try.
D: OK, I'll try to be quiet.

And then it happened. She fell asleep. Corryn stayed asleep.

Blessed silence.

Well, except for the so very soothing sounds of Norah Jones. It lasted for 30 whole minutes before Corryn woke up and started to fuss. I stopped, hoping to get to her before she woke Dillon, but no luck.

But it's ok, because it was 30 whole minutes of blessed silence.